CHILD BRIDES – SISTER GIRLS FIVE ASPECTS REGARDING THEIR LIVES

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A few days ago, I read about a young eight-year-old child bride in Yemen who died on her wedding night of internal bleeding uterine complications. Her groom was five times her age.

My mouth flew open, and my stomach turned into a knot. How dare he, I thought. How could he? I made a point of finding out why this little girl died in excoriating pain and the reason for her marriage at eight. I thought of my daughters, my grand daughters who at eight played with Barbie Dolls, line skated, rode their bicycles, and had sleepovers’ with a bunch of giggling girl friends.

1. WHERE DOES THIS HAPPEN?

Here is the list of twenty countries with the higher percentages of girl brides (2013 statistics)

Nigeria 75%

Central African Republic 68%

Chad 68%

Bangladesh 66%

Guinea 63%

Mozambique 56%

Mai 55%

South Sudan 62%

Burkina fasa  52%

Malawi 50%

Madagascar 48%

India 47%

Eritrea 47%

Somalia 45%

Sierra Leone 44%

Zambia 42%

Nepal 41%

Dominican Republic 41%

Ethiopia 41%

Nicaragua 41% 

If countries do not enforce age of consent to marry, by end of the decade 142 million girls will be married under the age of 18. One out of three girls lives in countries that allow girl bride ceremonies to occur. 

2, WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR FAMILIES TO MARRY THEIR GIRLS EARLY? 

Girls are not assets even though they receive a dowry.  Some of the reason are this is a tradition. I remember viewing a National Geographic show on TV and watching child brides get prepared for their wedding. They were laughing and smiling, and never did I consider the plight of these young girls. There are social stigmas attached to older women who are beyond the marriageable age. 

3.  WHAT HAPPENS TO THESE GIRLS?

They find themselves trapped forever in a life of poverty like their mother and their mother’s mother and so on.

Education stops as soon as they are married. After all, their responsibility is to their husband and they must accept the role of a wife. If not, they’ll receive a beating, or they receive beatings for just the heck of it. For many they have no where to turn.

They have early pregnancies. Girls under the age of 15 are five times more likely to die during childbirth.

The girls suffer from obstetric things like fistulas and urinary prolapses. 

Here is another story about a young Ethiopian girl who married at 13. She became pregnant and lost her baby. Because she ended up with a fistula, her husband divorced her. Finally, she was able to obtain a surgery. Again, she was married and lost her child. After her childbirth, she obtained another fistula, and once again her second husband divorced her. She supported herself as best as she could on petty trade. She continued in this manner on bare existence. Until she meant an agency, who gave her psychological treatment and helped her rise above her poverty. 

4. WHAT ARE THE ARGUMENTS SUPPORTING CHILD BRIDES?

 It is tradition or “ethnic identity.” A girl is safer married from all sexual predators. But what about the brother of the groom who forces sex on the brother’s wife? She is beaten. After all this is her fault. 

5. WHAT LIES AHEAD IF THINGS CHANGE? 

Girls can receive an education and have a positive impact on health, economy and poverty reduction for themselves and their communities. 

There is hope some of these countries listed who have child brides are passing laws to raise the age of marriage for girls. The problems I see with this are who is going to enforce this? Is it only after a death of a child that the community, her country and the world becomes alarmed? 

Two years ago, US passed an International law protecting girls by passing the Preventive Child Marriage Act and Violence Against Women’s Act, which addresses child marriage in our foreign policy. 

My hope is these little girls can one day enjoy a sunny day and be allowed to grow and learn through ,education so they can make an influence on their communities and their country. I hope one day instead of being a little bird with a clipped wing, these girls can fly and soar to heights for themselves and humanity. Let their be no limits.  In the mean time, my sister girl bride, I can pray for you and this is what I’m going to do.  

(All information and statistics came from  http://www.girlsnotbrides.org

I would love to hear what you think of this. Leave me a commit. I’ll next blog on Tuesday, September 17.  In the mean time, God Bless you all.

 

 

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9 thoughts on “CHILD BRIDES – SISTER GIRLS FIVE ASPECTS REGARDING THEIR LIVES

    • Hi Aya!
      Thank you for following me. I was told I need to have at least 230 some followers. I am glad for the folloers I have Yes, this touched my heart. Little girls becoming child brides. Oh my goodness. I wasn’t ready to be a wife at 21 let alone eight or thirteen or be a mommy. I wish if wealthy I could provide a shelter for them on a big complex that would be safe and secure and provide bikes, skates, swimming pools, animals to pet, and most all K through high school education,.With all of this, I could give them plenty of hugs and lots of love plus psychological help if needed.. They’d be ready for college on graduation. i know I’m a dreamer. Maybe this is the reason why I write fiction.:-) Take care and bless you.

  1. Hi!

    The prevalence seems so high in African nations, it almost seems unreal. I’m curious to learn how these stats were obtained. From personal observation though, village life is totally different from city life. So girls who grow up in the village only know and learn what they see. The patriarchal nature of African society obviously contributes to the submissive nature of women. It’s ingrained in the girl child to obey and do. Things are obviously changing, but clearly not fast enough. Girls have to grow up real fast, I’m glad you opened up this conversation…

    • Hi Burpe!
      I left a link on the blog of where I obtained my information. Perhaps, it tell where they received the statistics. In this country,I believe in the 1800’s girls were married early and of course this was a patriarchal family unit. But in this day and age, girls deserve a chance to be girls and grow up to become educated women if they care to do so.
      My heart hurts for children who are abused, misused and not given a chance to step away from the chains of poverty, abuse and addictions. My heart hurts for the girl who has to go out and do tricks to feed her siblings because her mother has aids and is to sick to work. There is so much tragedy in this world. This is one of the places United States has not done enough to help these children in other cournties. By this I mean, there are many wealthy people who have so much money, they don’t even know what do with it. They spend on things trying to get happiness when the gift of love (money) could do so much for these girls. .

  2. This is a heavy topic! Indeed..Liberated feminist that I am my heart breaks when I hear of such things..I’ve only read of them; but being that I’ve not yet visited Africa(though it is on my list of to-visit places…) can’t say I’ve observed this personally. A topic I have read up on though is female circumcision(which is just as disturbing..) There are so many things we, as Americans, can’t understand or relate to..For it isn’t our culture..Certainly just as there is the same said of how those from other countries view come of our customs/traditions..One could ask if we truly have a right to impose our influence onto others way of living? Whose to say some of the things that occur right here in America are just as barbaric? I mean, honestly, we’ve got folks being killed just because of the color of their skin or sexual preferences/discriminated against/beaten..So many deep thoughts invoked when I read something of this nature..I do thank you for sharing..I’ve got quite a bit of reading to catch up on here..Deep stuff! But you know I love reading & learning..xoxoxoxoxoxoxo!

  3. We have many girls here in the US, that are used and abused. Young prostitutes, druggies, runaways….then there is the active slave trade here in the US. Children, girls, women snatched to be used, bought and sold, whether here or into a foreign nation……pornography is rampant ! The goal of the pedophiles is to make pedophilia an ACCEPTABLE behavior. “Children want to experience love like we do” stated one 50 y/o Adult pervert. The sad thing is…it is EVERYWHERE…in family living rooms, bedroom of people you would never imagine.The movement is to accept the prostitute, accept the drugs, let go of the children, young adults to teach the children about homosexuality, lesbianism, transgender surgeries and dress. The end result is to promote pedophilia….it is a multi-billion dollar business all over the world. Pictures sold on the internet, videos, children sold like a pair of shoes ……all for a few gluttonist wealthy men who would sell their own children given the opportunity ! We are already a Sodoman and Ghamora and we are circuling the drain of Evil. We as individuals need to be UNIFIED and take a stand against this evil. Stand up for the RIGHT! Now!…Look at the people in the Government, local and federal….vote out the ones who are not firm on Christian morals and standards. Work hard to redefine the family to what it should be …2 consenting ADULTS to marry…and to use love and good sense to raise a family. Honor God and pray for direction and for those who have fallen off the path of righteousness. We are enveloped in this evilness, no matter where we are.

    • You are right, Barbara. However, I think my aim is to reflect and show the atrocities that occur in this country and occur all over the world. This world is a fallen world and there is so much unjustice that occurs here in the states and else where.
      As you know, my fiction writing concerns atrocities that women have to endure. This is one example of a young girl having to die needlessly because of culture, and poverty and because she is considered less than property. If Icould write a story about child brides, I would, but I do not understand the culture and the way of the people. i think it might be a good but tragic story.

      Thank you again for commenting my friend. You are a faithful and wonderful friend. I’m fortunate to call you my friend.

  4. So sad that these practices continue in the name of religion. Poverty encourages the powerful to take advantage of the powerless. My ex is a missionary in Zambia. I will ask him about these practices. He says witch doctors are common in the villages .

    • Yes, this is a travesty. I would be interested in hear if in Zambia they have early child brides. I sure as you know, the family does this to rid themselves of a mouth to feed because to have a girl is a liability not an asset.
      I am fortuntate to have three children, two daughters and a son. They all excel in their chosen vocations. Personally, I’m glad God let me be a female. To bear a child is a privilege. To have grandchildren is an blessing and an honor. For me to be married to Jose for going on 38 years is wonderful.
      I may not be rich, but I certainly am rich in all the blessings God’s gaven me and gives me.
      Thank you for coming back and reading my blog. Kathy. I appreciate it.

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